


Birds and the Bees

by Lipstickcat



Category: Eerie Indiana
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-04
Updated: 2015-10-04
Packaged: 2018-04-24 18:04:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4929724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lipstickcat/pseuds/Lipstickcat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dash tells a joke, Simon doesn't get it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Birds and the Bees

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the weekly prompt of "leaves" on the livejournal Eerie com. I set a timer and treated it as a 15 minute fic.

Dash laughed so hard at Simon's puzzled face, twisted and squinting up at him. In his mind, Dash had considered hanging with the younger boy babysitting duty, while Marshall was busy running around with whatever kid his own age he'd made friends with now. The truth was though, that Dash WAS a kid Marshall's own age and he'd still chosen to go running off with some other guy. It wasn't like Dash wasn't edgy or a weird mystery all bundled up in himself. He totally fulfilled Marshall's cool guys to hang with criteria. 

So anyway, yeah. Dash kinda got where Simon was coming from; sitting there on that wheel and trying for all the world to look like not falling off was the most entertaining thing a kid could do alone while avoiding going home. Dash knew that boat, he was floating along in a similar one, just he didn't have a home to avoid going back to. 

Figuring out how to connect with Simon, though, that was something else altogether. It didn't help that Dash was more mature than his years, thanks to that pesky not having a home thing. Maybe telling dirty jokes wasn't the best decision. 

"I don't get why that's funny. That's a panda's diet isn't it? Bamboo leaves?" 

Dash rolled his eyes and sighed. 

"No, you're not getting it. It's not about his diet. He eats. Shoots. And leaves." He waved his hands, punctuating each part. 

Simon just stared at him. 

Just how old was Simon again? They'd done sex ed. in school, right? Dash was regretting more than the joke now; he was regretting his whole life choices, as limited as his memory of them was. 

"You know what I mean by _shoots_ , right?" He made a couple of fist jerking gestures. Then a couple more, lower, around his waist area. Simon shook his head minutely. Dash opened his hand up in a couple of little explosive bursts, accompanied by a soft, wet sound effect. 

"...... You get that the panda had sex with her, right?" 

Simon crinkled his face in disgust and Dash laughed again. He couldn't remember a time he'd not wanted to _do it_ but there must have been one. He was probably innocent once too. 

"Come on kid." He put his arm around Simon's shoulder. "I got some magazines I need to show you..." 

If Marshall wanted to have a playdate with other kids, that was fine. It would be up to Dash to teach Simon the finer points of the birds and the bees.


End file.
